I really love cinema. I mean, I really really love cinema – even if the film’s rubbish, the whole sitting in the dark-ness, going to another time and space-ness of it can’t be beaten.
Near where we live in Brighton, there is a great cinema called the Duke of York’s. It’s a quality joint – great films, good snacks and decent booze. It opened in 1910 and is the oldest working cinema in the UK.
It has a giant pair of stripey legs on the roof.
But with all those bums on seats over the years, the seats don’t last forever and were recently replaced. So where do cinema seats go to when they retire?
Well, two of them came to our house. They were sold off in aid of Plan UK.
You know, cinema seats don’t fit in a Mini. We discovered this too late. And cinema seats are very heavy to carry. We discovered this too late as well. Luckily, if you need to pause when carrying cinema seats, you won’t be short of a resting place.
Why did the cinema seats cross the road?
To get to our house!
But we didn’t leave them outside forever.
I am now charging £8.50 to anyone who wants to sit in them. Two for one on Orange Wednesdays.