Runwhining Season: like Christmas but with more running, less gifts, same amount of whining

 

Now that it is March, the season of runwhining is upon us.running couch to 5k

Traditionally this is the time when all the people who took up running at the start of the year start to whine about it.

There is a slightly smug undertone to this whining because, y’know, they’ve been running whilst you’ve been hoovering up Haribos with your face.

I bet if you look down your Twitter or Facebook feeds or Google Reader, at least three of your friends are moaning about their running schedules right now. 

(Yes imaginary friends off the internet count. Imaginary friends off the internet always count)

So as not to break with tradition, I must now have a good old moan about the small amount of running I have been doing. Don’t blame me, it’s the law. The Law of Runwhining Season.

I am now into week 8 of the Couch to 5K program. Yes I realise we are actually 10 weeks in from the start of the year, but I lost a week to snow and doughnuts, plus it took me two weeks to get through week 5.

Week 5 of C25K is horrible. At this point the most you will have done is 8 minutes’ worth of running, then it suddenly whumps it up to 20 minutes. Then the next week goes back down to 8 minute bursts, like the whole 20 minute hobbling debacle never happened.

I only got through that bit by consulting Professor Google who said: Run slower. Apparently if you can run any slower than you are already doing, then you’re probably going too fast and are unlikely to make it through the program.

If internet chatter’s to be believed (and when is is NOT?), very few people get through this program and are doing the full 5K distance. First you gain the ability to run for 30 minutes, then after that you step up the pace to be able to do 5K in that time. So basically the whole Couch to 5K in 8 weeks is built on A LIE.

One side effect has been that I can fit into some jeans that didn’t fit at the start, so if I was the sort of person who gave a shit about stuff like that then that would be good.

Really I’m doing this for the zombies. Come the zombie apocalypse, it will be good to be able to get a move on.

As you can see from the screen shot here, I should be finished Couch to 5K within the week. Fingers crossed no zombie apocalypse before then.

 

 

PS My children have informed me that there is no zombie apocalypse imminent. They are implying that my motivation is flawed. And they couldn’t have told me this 10 weeks ago?! It’s things like this that led to the start of Runwhining Season in the first place.