The world’s worst competition – win a foot grater – COMPETITION NOW CLOSED


You know how sometimes a competition sounds great, then you click on the link and it ain’t so hot? Not here. I’m promising little and delivering less. foot graterAs 2011 comes to a close, let’s round it off in style, with the chance to win a truly terrible prize.

Compers – can you handle the world’s worst competition?


Look, there’s no point in trying to dress it up, it’s a foot grater. Known to its manufacturers as a Ped Egg, it has 135 stainless steel microfiles, so no foot rind is too tough for this bad boy. Includes a compartment in which to store your foot shavings. NB not to be confused with parmesan shavings. That would be very bad.

foot grater shavingsIt’s sealed and unused, that’s the best I can say about it. A PR gave it to me. It’s a little piece of the glamour of media life. That you can shave your foot with.


Leave a comment below telling me why you deserve this terrible prize. Daughter of Mine will be choosing a winner, after she’s done her homework.

Closing date: Midnight on Tuesday 6th December.


If you’re really keen, tweet ‘I’m entering the #terriblecompetition @joannemallon ‘

And for the ultra competitive, there’s an extra entry for Facebook likers of this blog, whether you want one or not.

Say if you are claiming any extra entries. I won’t judge you (much).


The restrictions are, there are no restrictions. We’ll post this feller anywhere in the world. We just want to get rid of it.

Who’s brave enough to enter the world’s worst competition?

It’s over to you.

You can find more competitions (better than this) at Loquax Competitions and ThePrizeFinder – UK Competitions

  • Oh, please, please, please pick me!

    I never win anything, and I would so love a Ped Egg.

    Seriously. I adore anything scrapy or squeezy or otherwise mildly gross and unpleasant. Being able to grate my feet and then inspect the results would make me feel all happy inside.

    If I don’t win I will have to ask someone to buy me one for Christmas. And that would be wrong in a lot of ways, I think.

  • Do you think it could work as a Parmesan grater? Or novelty nutmeg grater? Not as well as a footgrater obviously, that would be a bit cannibalistic (and mega-gross!)

  • Well I’ve tweeted and I’m commenting, but only because I have the luck of winning the “disgusting” prizes… I deserve to win because.. erm… well because it’s nearly Christmas.

  • Jo Brooks

    if I won the Ped Egg, I’d not need to buy it in-store, especially as I’m kind of embarrassed to buy it, so you’d be sparing my blushes! (and it does look rather good, even my husband said “what on earth would you want that for?” – err, for NICE FEET!)

    I’m now also off to tweet as MumFriendlyJo 🙂


  • Aw C’mon- it’s not THAT bad a prize, and just think of the lovely soft feet I will have if I win.

  • steph armstrong

    I’ll have feet I can be proud to show if I win this stunning prize – even my husband will think my feet are OK.

  • I have had one of these for over a year and love it. You’ll be disgusted at how much skin you can accumulate in the little egg bin thingy. One word of warning – you can get quite carried away and end up taking too much skin off, so be careful!

  • carole

    pick me so i can be a real smoothie

  • OK, I am entering, just cause I don’t want your daughter to be disappointed 🙂 Plus I have a foot thing going, but shhh, don’t tell anyone 🙂

  • I already have one – if I won a second I could grate both feet at the same time!

  • claire woods

    I would like to win one as I suffer from hard skin, which is not nice.

  • claire woods

    Tweeted – @clairew137

  • claire woods

    Liked on FB.

  • Oh yes please – I run marathons, REALLY need one of these @MummyFever

  • nat

    I am actually in desperate need for one of these, as i have been working abroad this summer and my foot has grown a solid layer of skin on my heels from walking round in sandals and bar footed by the pool and on the beach….Please help my poor feet x

  • Sue McCarthy

    I have hard skin on my heels so this would be useful

  • Of course I don’t actually need one of these for myself… gah, who am I kidding? PICK MEEEEEEE!

  • carol coldicott-stirmey

    I walk around bare foot,as shoes and me disagree,so as my feet are on permanant show,this is the prize for me

  • Carol Coldicott- Stirmey (FB)

    @carol_castirmey (twitter)

    Entered on both, cheers

  • Lisa Day

    I have the ickyiest heels and it would actually be a very good prize for me lol.I really need to sort them out.

  • carolyn c

    At last a rescue package for my ‘help save my feet campaign’

  • robertbarr

    I should win because ive never won anything so it would be ironic to win the worlds worst comp as my first ever win

  • the feet have so much hard skin to remove and this would be ideal.

  • ashleigh

    i would love to win to get rid of the hard skin so that i can wear my lovely party shoes for my christmas night out!

  • ashleigh

    i have tweeted as @ashlallan

  • laura jones

    id love this prize being alone i can sit and file my feet in bed well the dog dont mind and then when i meet a nice man ill have fab tootsies to play footsie with!

  • Maya Russell

    I’d like one because my feet look like the rind of hard cheese!

  • Maya Russell

    Follow on Twitter and tweeted.

  • Maya Russell

    Already like/follow on Facebook as Maya Russell.

  • Vanessa van der Kramer

    I should win this Ped Egg because my feet deserve it.

  • Oh dear god that is just what I need to get the hard skin of my dear old mother in laws otherwise perfect feet, bless her she does insit on sitting with them soaking in a bowl of turps each day as she attempts to soften her poor old aging pegs, I warn her time and again that sitting soaking in front of an open fire is a terrible fire risk, but to no avail.

    A ped egg could change her life, of course we would have to train someone to use it for her, she is a game old bird, but sadly not to good at picking up new skills, does it come with illustrated instructions, that would probably help with her memory problems some kind of step by step guide.

    I really don’t understand why you feel this is a terrible price, my mother in law would talk about it for months, which would make a change from asking us who we are each time we call round.

    Regards Jane Brooks

  • Siobhan Bligh

    I cant find any cheese graters that grate to a fine, thin dust. This looks like it would do the job, assuming it hasnt be used

  • Glynis

    Okay- confession time. I have the most disgusting habit of picking off dead and dying cracked heel skin. There, the world knows now. I do dispose of it carefully, but pick I do.

    usually I do this semi-privately, by slipping a small hand into my wooly sock but very occasionally dear husband will draghis eyes away from trash on TV and say “What y’doing?” At which I will pull my hand out of sock and say “Nothing” , or say I have an itchy foot. Or a sore verucca. I am running out of plausible excuses. So an egg ped would be just the ticket, and I could stop being a closet heel picker, and file with a flourish! Thank you.

  • Jill Osborne

    My feet could be greater!

  • Sheila Herd

    It would be “grate” to be “picked”.
    Glad it’s new and not used!

  • Kevin Honey

    My wife has one, but i dare not share it!

  • I’ll have feet I can be proud to show if I win this stunning prize – even my husband will think my feet are OK.

  • rose p


  • Zoe Richards

    I want to win one of these so when my Byfriend grates his feet, I don’t have to clean up his dead foot skin off my newly washed bedding… PLEASE HELP ME INJECT SOME MUCH NEEDED HYGIENE INTO MY HOUSE! 😀 x

  • Colin Gault

    My feet have about one inch of hard skin which needs getting rid of lol

  • Sheila

    I would love to win as I cant afford the expensive fish eating treatments!

  • I would like to win one, because I think it would make a fabbie Chocolate grater. Have you experienced grating chocolate, and then it melts all over the place when you try to pick it up. Use this – and grated chocolate safe inside. Just REMEMBER Not to leave it laying where someone else can grate feet at same time.

  • Beverley

    I don’t seem able to win anything good, so I might stand a chance at winning something awful! Seriously, I’ve always wanted to try one – I suffer with dry heels and whilst I don’t object to a long, leisurely moisture-laden bath, I’d sooner spend it sampling wine and reading a good book, not footpiggling.

  • Beverley

    Have tweeted as bev_metallica

  • How can you not want to win ‘The Worlds Worst Competition’. What an achievement !!!!

  • Sue Warr

    I will be 49 on Christmas Day and that deserves a present……. If I won, maybe by the time I hit 50 I will have feet I can show off in my sling back party shoes!!! I have the worse skin ever on my heels!

  • Margaret

    And what has your poor daughter done that she has to judge the world’s worst competition?! Seriously though, I disagree with that title its actually a very useful prize, well for me at least, as anyone who has ever seen my feet will testify! Not that there’s many of them since my feet always remain well hidden in my trainers 🙂

  • : :
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  • A lump of dry skin fell off my foot in bed a couple of nights ago, I think it’s time to sort it out!

  • Tweeted as 12kazuko12

  • Laura Pritchard

    You say it’s the worst prize ever…I’m sure my husband would disagree as he has to feel my rough feet rubbing on his legs in bed (& they’re usually cold to add insult to injury!)… WE need this!

  • Laura Pritchard

    I’ve tweeted the message @Isis1981uk

  • Laura Pritchard

    I like you on Facebook.

  • My feet are worse than that of a postman.
    And I think it would be ‘grate’ to grate them.
    Okay, world’s worst competition, worlds worst joke.

    I think that about sums it up.
    Pick me!

  • Jo

    My husband has always wanted a “Ped Egg”. Not because of unsightly or misshapen feet with callouses, nor for its apparent utility as a Parmesan grater, as even he can see the potential for a disastrous mishap.

    The reason he wants one is that he has been traumatized by the prospect of old age and a commercial that clearly pointed out that a perfect evening could be spoiled by rough, dry elbows. In that commercial, the solution to the problem was the liberal use of baby oil, however, my husband has ethical problems with the commercialization of babies simply to extract their oil. In his mind the “Ped Egg” is the only viable alternative.

    Please help me put him out his misery (and stop him dictating this comment because he is too chicken to enter the competition under his own name).

  • Lowe

    I would love to win this rubbish prize as I need a Secret Santa gift for someone I don’t like very much. Who has horrible feet. And a big nose (but I know the ped egg won’t fix that).


    Have liked on FB and tweeted.
    I really need this…I’m ashamed to say…the rough skin on my feet actually catches on my carpets…how awful

  • Ami Pilbrow

    Hows this for cheap family entertainment this Christmas? Grate your own feet and then grate your partners/kids/the dogs feet so you have a combination of foot shavings. Then take turns examining them and try to pick each others out. The whole family can play! Can you pick out Auntie Jeans shavings or could they be Uncle Bobs?

    Brilliant. Hours of fun.

  • C Taylor

    It would be kinder than letting my boyfriend use the black and decker sander on my feet again because he couldnt find a pumice stone!

    And I thought my sister buying my an Iron holder for my birthday was the worst present (the kind you screw to your door to put your iron in whilst it is still hot)

  • sue willshee

    This is only a terrible prize if you have lovely smooth feet. If on the other hand (or should that be the other foot) you have hobbit feet like mine (tough and hairy) then this is a fab prize 🙂

  • Emma Howard

    I’d love a Ped Egg. My boyfriend has one and swears by it, but as much as I love him, I can’t bring myself to share his!

  • carol phile

    Daughter of mine would LOVE this prize. We don’t think it’s terible at all. Her skind cracks on her feet and they get spre so this would be a great help x

  • Bex Downey

    I’ve got SMELLY FEET! A grater would be GRATE and the answers to my footPRAYERS!
    TITLE: Dayton Allard
    BLOG NAME: Dayton Allard
    DATE: 01/04/2012 09:04:03 AM
    Awesome article post.Much thanks again. Fantastic.